Things we would like to see changed

November 2023

As Fall is associated with change, we asked our writers this month to reflect on things they would like to see changed in the world

Parenting through technology

Gracie Smith
MSMU Class of 2027

Society as a whole is nothing like it was 20 years ago. The kids of 20 years ago are faced with a generation that is growing up watching TikTok. The kids of 20 years ago are faced with a generation that has no idea of the importance of respect and responsibility. The next generation is largely being parented by cell phones and iPads instead of learning how to be successful in life. This is a huge problem that needs to be fixed before society crumbles in the hands of technology. The rapid and out-of-hand progression of technology is negatively impacting future generations, and it needs to be changed.

My parents are the reason I am the young woman I am today. From a very young age, my mother and father instilled the importance of respect into my brain. It has always been "yes ma’am," "yes sir," "please," and "thank you." Being humble and kind is a family pillar where I come from. As an 18-year-old, I am now able to see how my actions reflect upon others and in return how their actions reflect on me. Where I work, I am often faced with disrespectful people, and I can personally say that most of my disrespectful customers are the younger generations. They have little to no respect for their elders, but rather a sense of impatience, and furthermore, they misbehave in situations where it is completely inappropriate to do so. If I were as disrespectful as some of the kids I see, my mother would have lost her mind. Firstly, she would have dragged me out of wherever we were no matter how much I fought her. Secondly, she would’ve given me a stern lecture in a way that intimidated me so much I would never do it again. The number of times I see children with cell phones as a result of their behavior makes me question: what is this child learning from this behavior? How is this a solution for children these days, and their relationship with technology?

Additionally, the future generations are learning nothing about responsibility. For example, students today don’t do homework, and they don’t realize the importance of being responsible. I was 16 when I bought my 2015 Jeep Cherokee and could not be prouder of my car. I have been working a steady job since my sophomore year of high school in order to make my monthly car payment. If I’m late, I pay a late fee. If I don’t have the money to make my monthly car payment, then I pick up more hours at work or take money out of my savings. Life never throws you a bone. No matter what happens, you will always have responsibilities and bills to pay. I know what it’s like to be held responsible for something, and now I know what it’s like to pay a late fee because I made my payment on the 2nd and not the 1st. If parents realize the bigger picture and ultimately strive to put their kids in a position to succeed in life, their children will grow up relying on their own hard work and integrity rather than relying on technology that diminishes the idea of responsibility.

As I mentioned before, the future generations are growing up watching TikTok instead of the televised blessings we 2000s kids had: shows such as The Backyardigans, Wonder Pets, Max and Ruby, Bob the Builder, etc. I didn’t get my first cell phone until I was going into high school. Nowadays, I see seven-year-olds with their own phones. When I was seven, I thought it was awesome that I had a Disney Princess CD player that I could listen to KidzBop with. As far as I am concerned, a child should not own a cell phone until middle school at the very least, due to the effect it might have on their social and physical development. While I personally think that is still too young, society is different than it was 20 years ago. When I was in middle school, I was faced with multiple challenges since I did not own a cell phone—challenges that forced me to think out of the box and deepen my cognitive skills. To this day, I do not have TikTok installed on my phone, and I don’t want to install it. Call me old fashioned (hence writing for the newspaper), but there is no value in having TikTok, nor does it actually succeed in entertaining me, while it might for someone else. Why would I watch someone rate their food recipe when I could read a cookbook by Betty Crocker and get much better results? At the end of the day, while it is understandable and useful to use technology to help enforce a child’s behavior, technology should not be used as a constant replacement of parenting. This is because children rely too heavily on what their parents teach them, and learning from a screen more often than learning from their parents can be detrimental to their future.

If technology is going to continue to brainwash our younger generations, then I urge parents to limit screen time as much as possible and spend time with their children. Parents are crucial in a child’s life, and children naturally and beautifully learn so much from them. If society continues in this negative direction ruled over by technology, I pray that my generation is strong enough to take over before technology harms us all and causes irreversible effects. The blatant lack of respect towards others, lack of responsibility, and the constant thirst for technology by younger generations is embarrassing and overall scary. One of the only things that can be changed to prevent our world from being fully consumed by technology is changing the style and motivation that informs parenting. The evolution of technology is inevitable, but parenting is something that will always have the greatest effect on a child and how successful they will be in life.

Read other articles by Gracie Smith

A global urgency: end rape

Devin Owen
MSMU Class of 2026

With the changing of the seasons comes change in mindset and habits in our daily lives: we no longer are wearing shorts and tank tops outside. We aren’t at the beach in our swimsuits multiple days a week, but rather, we are at school or work and wrapping up in warm, cozy comfort clothes as the leaves change their colors and the air gets a little cooler with every hour that passes by. With the changes in mind, it leaves us to wonder what some other changes we could or would like to see—not just in our daily lives—but in the world itself.

I, for one, have a very long list of the changes in the world that I would like to see, but the one I’ll focus on is rape and sexual assault. Rape is, and has been, a very large and on-going issue in the world for a very long time. Worse than that though, is the stigma that follows it around: it’s not the rapist’s fault that they did it if the victim was wearing something provocative, or if they lead them on—the list goes on and on. This is a crime that knows no boundaries; an undeniably horrific violation of one’s physical and emotional integrity, and an affront to the principles of human dignity.

One of the most alarming aspects of this issue is the sheer prevalence of rape worldwide. According to the Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network Organization (RAINN), there is an average of about 463,634 victims of sexual violence in just America, and that ranges from ages 12 and up—meaning that it doesn’t include the thousands of younger children being preyed upon or attacked before they even can comprehend what ‘it’ is. It was also stated by the organization that 82 percent of the juvenile victims and 90 percent of the adult victims of rape are female. The World Health Organization estimates that about one in three women worldwide has experienced sexual violence from either a partner or non-partner at some point in their lifetime. As a woman, this information is horrifying and serves as an explanation for why we are as cautious as we are in public. However, it is not only women that suffer, but men are also victims of rape and that itself should be talked about more. RAINN notes that one out of every ten rape victims are male and that in America alone, 2.78 million men have been victims of attempted or completed rape. A sad truth of the crisis of rape in the world happens to be that there is severe underreporting of cases due to fear of stigma and retaliation: will I be blamed for this? Will anyone believe me? It’s my word over theirs, is that enough? What if they shame me…does it matter what I was wearing? These are all questions left for a survivor to ask—a result of the stigmas of rape.

Consent is a huge part of this crisis as well though, as it happens to lay the foundation for intercourse itself. Consider what it says in the Universal Declaration of Human Rights; every individual has the right to life, liberty, and security of person. Rape is a very clear violation of said fundamental human right, and in order to violate that right, one has to forego the unsaid law of consent. Something as simple as asking "is this okay?" or "are you sure?" is considered to be consent. The impact of such blatant disregard for human rights also affects those around the victim as they are there with the victim for the aftermath—the emotional and psychological aftermath.

I’m going to get more personal here, which is hard because such a blatant disregard for human rights is hard to talk about. When I was in high school, I was sexually assaulted by a close friend of mine, someone I believed to care about me and my well-being. At first, I didn’t realize that it was actually assault because I willingly went to see a friend at their home, but in the end, I went home with less innocence than I started with. There comes a point though, when you are with someone that certain trust and kindness should be shown; being flipped around like a ragdoll to do what it is that that the second party here desires—while you beg for them to stop, while you call out "no" and "please, I can’t," repeatedly—is not something that exudes trust and kindness, and most certainly not consensual. This is a violation of privacy and human rights so inhumane that you are kept up with nightmares about it for years; a violation that prevents you from forming close relationships with other people, from allowing physical touch from men because you are so terrified that something—anything—might happen again. The cherry on top of this experience, is that this "friend" of mine has no idea that he ever did anything wrong, and at the end of this experience, he left me to leave with the message of: "well you’re a little less innocent now, you’re very welcome." To this day the thought of what happened that night creates a knot in my stomach that tightens into a coil; like a snake wrapped around its prey, squeezing the life out of me.

It's hard to realize that rape or assault isn’t something that is just done by strangers; it, in most cases, is carried out by someone we might know or even someone we could be close with. Try to imagine that: someone you’re incredibly close with choosing to violate your being in such a violent and horrific way, that you are left to pick up your broken pieces for years to come, by yourself.

It doesn’t matter what we wear, how we interacted with others that might lead to "misunderstandings," or if it’s a boy or a girl: no means NO. Frankly, it’s a phrase that I wish more people understood.

This is a change I want to see in the world…it’s a change that the world needs to see.

Read other articles by Devin Owen

Where have all the Good Samaritans gone?

Dolores Hans
MSMU class of 2025

When did adults stop teaching kids to be Good Samaritans? Growing up, I remember my parents, teachers, and other adults encouraged me to be overly kind and trusting, and to see the good in people, following the example of the Good Samaritan. Some adults weren’t even aware of the religious affiliation of this phrase, but knew it was a quality of person that showed selflessness, dependability, and trust. I was recently reminded of the importance of trust when a stranger, much like the Good Samaritan, selflessly returned a large amount of money that was accidentally sent to her rather than me. She had every opportunity to keep the money for herself, yet she chose to acknowledge that it was a technological mistake and graciously returned it. In an age where technology provides many opportunities for scams and fraud, I tend to miss the simplicity of my childhood. Now, as an adult, I see children being taught that "those who easily trust are easily deceived," and phrases like "stranger danger" or that people will take advantage of them if given the chance.

The Parable of the Good Samaritan comes from The Bible, in the Gospel of Luke. It is as follows: "A man fell victim to robbers…They stripped and beat him and went off leaving him half-dead. A priest happened to be going down that road, but when he saw him, he passed by on the opposite side. Likewise, a Levite came to the place, and when he saw him, he passed by on the opposite side. But a Samaritan traveler who came upon him was moved with compassion at the sight. He approached the victim, poured oil and wine over his wounds and bandaged them. Then he lifted him up on his own animal, took him to an inn and cared for him. The next day he took out two silver coins and gave them to the innkeeper with the instruction, ‘Take care of him. If you spend more than what I have given you, I shall repay you on my way back.’… Jesus said to him, ‘Go and do likewise’" (Luke 10:29-37).

This passage probably seems as though it takes place in some far-off utopian world, according to now-a-days standards and practices. We used to relate to this story. We used to hear this and think of someone in our lives who was a Good Samaritan to us, the wounded. Or think of a time when we helped someone in need regardless of what was in it for us. Today, we hear this story and ask questions like, "How does the Good Samaritan know he can trust the wounded man not to rob him?" We can all say we understand that when someone is deeply wounded (physically or emotionally) they will turn around and hurt others, especially those who try to help them heal. "What if the wounded man had a past of cruelty and sin? How can the Good Samaritan justify saving them?" Because why lend a hand to someone who could have hurt others? "What if those who robbed him were people that he had wronged? He deserved justice, not help." It is so easy to assume the worst about others.

Isn’t it so easy to justify your own negligence and coldness toward others when you’ve made up a good enough reason? How many times have we walked by a homeless man because we assumed he would just spend the money on drugs or alcohol, which is probably how he ended up in his position anyway? How many times have we walked down the street and assumed the man behind us is following us because men have no control over their desires? How many times have we blamed our parents for our shortcomings because if they had tried to heal from the trauma their parents put them through, we would be better off. How many people are we going to turn our back on because they don’t live up to our standards, or because it is not our job to fix them? "You need to put yourself first." Not selfish. "Don’t give away your trust until they earn it." Better safe than sorry. "Screw your family." They don’t understand or appreciate you. "He won’t share his feelings with me." He must be immature, or cheating, dump him.

When does it end? We are not the only ones hurting. We are not the only ones with responsibilities. We can have every reason in the world not to help, but where will that get us? If we turn our back on someone, regardless of their circumstance, then there is no reason to have hope in the world. And isn’t that what we have become? A hopeless world?

In this world, and especially in this generation, we have put up our guards. We have been taught and trained to assume the worst, to live in fear, and to put ourselves first. But what about the Good Samaritan? Forget about caring for the wounded man by personally bandaging his wounds and bringing him to an inn and spending money to provide him with comfort and security, we can’t even comprehend giving away a meal to a hungry stranger, or engaging in a conversation with someone we think is below us. We can’t even do the bare minimum of trusting our own family and significant others not to deceive us.

I believe that if there was something to change about our world, it would be to restore trust and hope in humanity. We live in a society full of untrustworthy people who scam us and hurt us in countless ways, building us to form distrusting habits and mindsets. Whether it is something as drastic as parents separating, or as simple as returning money that doesn’t belong to us, we assume people will only do what is right and convenient for themselves.

Let us find the Good Samaritans of our time. Let’s honor them, put them on the news rather than all the hate and crime that goes on in our world, and follow their example. What is stopping you from being a Good Samaritan? "Go and do likewise."

Read other articles by Dolores Hans

Let it snow, again

Claire Doll
MSMU Class of 2024

I would change the snow, make it last forever.

All winters would be white, like they used to be: cold, crisp, sparkling air. Snow-dusted blades of grass, and barren, silhouetted trees. My old home where the sun rose through the kitchen window, golden light bouncing off the glistening frost. The smell of hot chocolate from the kitchen. The ever-telling door that sounded when my dad came home from work: thudding footsteps, keys jingling, setting sunlight following him inside. Frozen flakes clinging to his uniform, whispers of wind before he closed the door. The anticipation you felt when you woke up on a scarlet morning and glimpsed out the windows, a sliver of white blanketing everything you knew.

Snow is threaded in every memory of winter. Sparkling silence, untouched nature. Snow is winter, making up Christmas and New Year’s and all the holidays in those barren months. Snowfall is what makes the winter evenings so romantic, makes the mornings worthy, makes the afternoons slow and hushed as we watch from our windows.

Except we didn’t get any snow last winter.

Instead, we got gray skies and ice-slicken roads. We got a cold Christmas, a mild New Year’s, and a thawing February that felt as though we had already been living in spring for months. But not a single flake of snow. Not a single snow day for students, or a morning we woke up to silence and sparkling sheets in our backyard. While I love the warm weather and the blossoming of spring, I can’t help but grieve for the winters I knew as a child.

Global warming and climate change have become a threat to not only winters, but all seasons as we know them. In an article by How Stuff Works, authors Patrick J. Kiger and Desiree Bowie write, "By the end of this century, spring and summer could begin a month earlier, and autumn and winter might arrive half a month later. Summers could extend to nearly half the year, with less than two months of winter by 2100."

This shocking news asks us to redefine our seasons and slowly let go of what winter once was. Instead of cold months and long nights and snow-dusted mornings, we will start to see milder temperatures, earlier blooming flowers, and less snow in the forecast. Frankly, we are entering a period where we might lose the winters we once had as a child.

"For much of the eastern United States…winter has been a bust," writes Michael Casey in an article on AP News, calling the climate "a winterless winter." The memories we once fondly reminisced upon will soon become an image of the past we can hardly grasp, let alone wish for.

So rather, I would change climate change in general, make it avoidable, perhaps even nonexistent. As a 21-year-old in this society, I dream about my future. I dream about world travel, and marrying the love of my life, and having children, and venturing through the seasons of life much like I do the seasons of the year. I dream about quiet snow days in the same way I dream about sunny summer days. I long for all seasons, for the cold and the warm, for the light and the dark.

But with threatening climate change and the most recent world tensions involving Israel and Hamas putting pressure on the world—as well as other serious global issues such as poverty and economic inequality and hunger—I fear deeply for the future I once idolized as a child.

It makes sense, though. Being born in 2001—the year of our nation’s catastrophic terrorist attacks—my generation’s identity "has been shaped by the digital age, climate anxiety, a shifting financial landscape, and COVID-19" (McKinsey & Company). I remember my childhood as beautiful and wondrous, filled with family. I could spend hours thumbing through the photo albums in my basement: pictures of the playground set in my backyard, the piles of autumn leaves, the blizzard in second grade that called off schools for a week. But my pre-teenage years were characterized by social media (how many likes did I get on Instagram?) and normalized school shootings (where is the best hiding spot in the classroom?) and the dreaded, continuous, irreversible climate change conversation (where have the snow days gone?). Once I graduated high school into a global pandemic, my worldview was shockingly pried open. I have loved college, and I anticipate my future career, but entering the job and housing market and inflated grocery store prices and an earth without winters—it’s terrifying.

Sometimes all I wish for is the snow.

Or rather, I wish for nothing to have changed at all. If I could go back to that townhouse in the corner of my old neighborhood, the one the sun touched every day, the one where all four seasons watched me grow, I would. As an emerging adult with the anxiety of a teenager and the heart of a child, I would give anything to wish away the problems in this world today.

Of course, reality has different plans, ones that we must confront rather than avoid. Although winters might look and feel different, it is important to both preserve what we once knew and act now—take responsibility for our own carbon footprint, and demand action from larger corporations. Demand they take accountability. Wealthy polluters, rich countries, and sometimes, ourselves.

But take a moment to remember your fondest memory of snow. Perhaps it is with your children, on a day off school, dressing them in cozy snowsuits. Watching their little footprints dot the white blanket, smiling as they take off on a sled down a hill. Or perhaps it is with your partner, brewing hot chocolate or sipping wine while you watch the snowfall from a frost-painted window. Perhaps it is with your parents, your friends, yourself. Flakes drifting on Christmas Eve, or a rush of snow in a February blizzard. It’s winter, the silent months. The months we gather together and slow down. The months we desperately need to hang onto, especially now. In this world, in these scary, frightening days, we all need to watch the snow, smell the crisp air moments before the flakes fall.

Read other articles by Claire Doll

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